Kids & Family
New Book By Grief Expert Kristi Hugstad Tackles Teen Suicide
"Beneath The Surface: A Teen's Guide To Reaching Out When You Or Your Friend Is In Crisis" Works As A Handbook For Suicide Prevention
Depression and suicide are not topics Americans like to talk about. But author and educator and grief recovery specialist, Kristi Hugstad, believes that is precisely the reason we do need to talk about them.
“It’s not an easy topic to discuss. It’s awkward and uncomfortable to bring it up, which is why we tend to avoid it,” says Hugstad. “But talking about it could save someone’s life, especially if you know how to recognize the signs of depression and how to discuss it.”
That’s why Hugstad has written a new book about recognizing the warning signs of depression and suicide, Beneath the Surface: A Teen’s Guide to Reaching Out When You or Your Friend Is in Crisis (New World Library).
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The book offers facts about depression and suicide as well as personal stories to help the points resonate. It also includes sections about how to start a conversation about depression.
“Handling the conversation inappropriately can do more harm than good,” says the Hugstad. “That’s why it’s so important to know how to begin the discussion.”
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The book is aimed at teens since suicide is the second leading cause of death among Americans, age 15 to 24 (automobile accidents are #1). Statistics show in 2016, there were 13.2 suicides out of every 100,000 people under age 25 in America.
Some 8.6 percent of high schoolers have attempted suicide in the last 12 months. Gay and lesbian teens are five times more likely to try suicide than heterosexual teens, while transgender teens are nine times more likely to attempt suicide.
Another disturbing statistic – girls are twice as likely as boys to attempt suicide, but boys are three times more likely to complete suicide.
Hugstad explains that girls often use less deadly methods such as pills or poisons in their suicide attempts. However, boys choose more lethal ways such as guns or knives, which is why they complete suicides at much higher rates.
She hopes to help remove the stigma surrounding mental health issues and depression.
“Beneath the Surface is all about teaching our youth that having issues with mental health is not only OK, it’s normal and happens to all of us,” she says. “We need to start talking about it if we’re going to abolish the stigma. The conversations need to start with our youth so that they grow up in culture where it’s no longer stigmatized to say, ‘I’ve been depressed for a couple of months, I think there’s something wrong and I need to get professional help.’ If you broke your arm you wouldn’t wait around in bed and hope that it goes away. You would get help from a medical professional. That same needs to happen with our mental health.”
Hugstad, who lives in Dana Point, California, knows about suicide from first-hand experience. In 2012, after years of struggling with clinical depression, her husband killed himself by running in front of a train. She chronicled the details of his suicide and her own journey through depression following his death in her 2017 book, What I Wish I’d Known: Finding Your Way Through the Tunnel of Grief.
While that book was for people who are already grieving, she realized it’s vital to confront the stigma surrounding mental illness and depression early on. Thus, Beneath the Surface was born.
She describes Beneath the Surface as an “educational suicide prevention tool for teens, parents, teachers, and anyone working with our youth.” In the book, she talks ‘with’ the teens rather than ‘at’ the teens, which is the mistake adults often make when trying to discuss sensitive topics with teens.
Beyond suicide and depression, Beneath the Surface also has sections discussing issues like bullying, eating disorders, PTSD, anxiety, substance abuse and gender confusion. She notes that today’s teens face all the same issues their parents did as teenager – raging hormones, cliques and peer pressure – but are further confronted with issues around social media where bullying can be especially intense, plus issues like gun violence, mass shootings and climate change.
Although written to teens, many of the same issues discussed can apply to adults as well.
“Education is key. Had I known the risk factors and warning signs of suicide, I would have seen just how serious my husband’s situation had become,” she says. “When you’re familiar with the signs and symptoms, you’re empowered to act when you need to. Asking important, direct questions – ‘Have you thought about taking your life? Do you have a suicide plan?’ – is imperative, as is listening to the answers with love and without judgment.”
The book is available on Amazon. For more info: TheGriefGirl.com
