Father’s Day Tribute: What I've Learned From Dad

I've heard it said that dads "take a backseat" to moms in the relationships with their daughters. If this is true, then I'm telling you, there are daughters out there who are suffering because of it.  

I know this because my father is an equally important role model for me. My father, a strong yet sensitive man, has always been actively engaged in my life. He is loving, supportive, encouraging, protective, honorable and has a unique ability to inspire me.

I believe that what a father teaches his daughter will serve her for a lifetime. But it's those unspoken lessons that I observed while watching my dad that are arguably more impactful than any words or lectures he gave me.

And as I navigate my journey through life, I often laugh at the many 'like father, like daughter' moments. I certainly am my father's daughter.

So this Father's Day, I want to share the nine foundational life lessons my father taught me while growing up in Arizona.

Here they are:

1. Work Hard 

My dad epitomizes the lesson that you should never pay someone to do what you can do yourself. In addition to his daily duties as a father, husband, son, and president of his company, he is our go-to plumber, light bulb changer, exterminator, gardener, painter, and fix-it man. My family says it's because he has schpilkus, but I call it work ethic.

My dad has shown me that there is no substitute for a good work ethic. And while it’s hard to push yourself day in and day out, Dad taught me that if you work hard, you will be OK - no matter what happens. He always says, hard work, determination and a little bit of luck will get you anywhere you want to go.

2. It's OK to Splurge Sometimes 

Of course, my dad has taught me to save wherever I can. He’s the one who showed me how to maximize interest in my savings account, balance my checkbook and invest as much as I possibly can in my 401k, even though I'm only 22. But he also taught me to learn what I love and allocate money to spend on it. Good food, good wine, and a good shopping spree every once in a while? If dad says it's OK, it must be.

3. Play the Lottery

Sure, the odds are ridiculous. But my dad has taught me that you only get out of life what you’re willing to put into it, and you’ll never know if your dreams are possible if you don’t go for them. So play the Power Ball every once in a while and see what happens. (Yeah, nothing has happened yet).

4. Be Tough

My dad is certainly not a pacifist, and he does not let people walk all over him. Through his pride and his honor, he taught me to stand up for myself whenever I encounter something unjust. He helped to infuse my self-esteem and taught me to speak my mind, while also diplomatically picking my battles. And though it’s often hard, and out of my innate character to be defensive, I am so grateful for the strength he’s instilled in me.

5. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

And as my dad says, most of it is small stuff. Dad is always there to remind me what’s important in life: health, family and relationships.

6. Forgive, and Move On

Correspondingly, he’s taught me to forgive my friends, my family and myself. We are all human. All of us slip sometimes and make mistakes. Holding grudges and harping on the past only prevents us from enjoying life to the fullest.

7. Be Generous

My parents always gave to charity, supported non-profits, and made sure that we were exposed to people who don't have as much. Believe in the cause of donating, my dad tells me. When you give, don’t just give in order to get recognition, a tax write-off or a plaque at the temple. Give just to help and don’t expect anything in return.

8. You Can Always Talk to Dad

Since I was little, my father always made sure I knew that I could talk to him about anything. As a young girl, sometimes it was easier to go to Mom with stuff, but he always stayed involved. I go to my dad now with everything from work gripes to money questions to guy advice, and I know that he will try to help me as best as he can, always ready with honest answers and nonjudgmental feedback.

9. Family Comes First

My dad’s first priority is his family. Everything he does and every thought he has is for our well-being. He keeps the family closely knit and no one can come between the five of us (seven if you count the dogs).

In turn, I have been able to carry that sort of warmth and sincerity into my other relationships so that I am a true friend, and the people closest to me know how much I care about them. My dad makes sure I never need to question his love for me. And today, I hope there’s no doubt in his mind that his daughter loves him, too.