Teen Domestic Violence Chat Offers Healthy Dating Tips With HEART

ORANGE COUNTY, CA — February may be almost over, but teaching teens how to have and participate in healthy relationships is an ongoing subject. At Laura's House, the staff is on a continuous mission to help teenagers, middle school through high school, understand what is healthy in the world of dating, what is not, and how to watch out for red flags even amid the haze of newfound love.

Laura's House was inspired by an Orange County woman who fell victim to domestic violence. A group of women in Ladera Ranch rose to fill the need that Laura was denied, a chance at domestic violence survival. Now, that group seeks to educate teenagers on healthy relationships before it is too late.

The teenage campaign is called H.E.A.R.T.: an acronym for "Healthy Emotions and Attitudes in Relationships Today."

Spokespeople from Laura's House haven't let the pandemic stop them from outreach to teenagers who may be in relationship jeopardy. The group has outreach through area high schools and uses planned Zoom sessions to talk: Dating 101, how to Get Help if you're in trouble, or how to Get Involved if you know someone who is.

"In a typical year, we would be on campuses, reaching over 15,000 students," a spokesperson from Laura's House tells Patch. There has been nothing typical about this year. Upon the coronavirus shut down in March, Laura's House went virtual. The group has recently opened up a "Heart Chat Line," someone that teens can talk to who is trained in understanding how to help those in need.

The chat line helps answer questions about relationships, behaviors and determine if what teens are experiencing is normal. In essence, the chat line becomes a "digital advocate."

"The digital advocate answers questions and provides resources," they said. The person on the other end of the line is not a therapist, just extra support.

Though Laura's House groups typically would visit high schools on campus, they have become experts at Zoom Meetings this year.

El Toro High School teacher Gwen Harris described their H.E.A.R.T. session and how relevant that feature is with her teenage students.

"The presentation was very similar to the in-person version. Students were able to use the 'chat' feature to ask questions and participate in meaningful ways," Harris said. "It was fun being able to see my students' participate in regular school activities even though they were at their own homes."

According to McCallister, they point to those resources at Laura's House and other community resources.

Margaret Bayston, CEO and Executive Director of Laura's House, tells Patch that two out of three high schoolers have experienced some form of domestic violence or abuse. During the pandemic, those numbers may have risen even higher.

Orange County Sheriff Don Barnes—a Laura’s House Board Member—reports that domestic violence-related calls to the Sheriff’s Department are up 20 percent over last year at this time.

"Isolation raises the risk of domestic abuse," according to the Laura's Hosue website. Experts say that seclusion, stress from the pandemic may worsen already strained relationships. Laura's House staffers are in place to offer support to anyone at risk of domestic violence.

"We saw fewer teens last year due to virtual classrooms, but it is picking up," Bayston says.

It isn't just the teens who reach out. Sometimes, it is their parents.

"Three or four years ago, a father came in - his daughter was getting all these text messages from a former boyfriend," Andrea McCallister, Laura's House Director of Development, said. "He was desperate for help."

Approximately 57 percent of Orange County's kids have been abused amid the pandemic. Of those, 80 percent have stayed in that relationship as they don't know that there are options, Bayston says.

The chat line and other resources will ensure that teens and adults can learn more about what behavior is not acceptable and make positive changes that could save their lives.

Laura's House provides services to Orange County and nearby counties with 24-hour crisis intervention and legal advocacy to over 65,000 people and a goal of changing society's attitudes about domestic violence.

Learn more or book a presentation at: H.E.A.R.T (Healthy Emotions and Attitudes in Relationships for Teens Today).