Strong Stuff

A man walks into a bar. Actually, a man walks into a spa. OK, a stressed out man walks into a spa and orders a Swedish massage. He's had a long tiring day and is looking for a cozy comfortable place where he can lie down for a spell and savor the good feeling of relaxation. He moseys over to the bar like counter and notices the cute little attentive receptionist standing on the other side.

“What will it be mister?” She looks up to him while batting her long eyelash extensions.

“I'll have a Swedish massage, he replies placing his leather wallet on the counter. He then takes a deep breath as if his request alone has brought him tremendous relief.

“Long day uh? you look like you could use something a lot stronger than that,” the cute receptionist replies as she quickly begins typing up his treatment request.

“I can't handle that strong stuff anymore the man says, just a light Swedish massage will do.”

Suddenly, several more people huddle around the bar like counter requesting many different treatments.

Popular place, the man thinks to himself as a strong muscular woman walks over to him and greets him with a huge smile and a firm hand shake.

“Howdy, I'm Matilda, she says, and I'm going to give you a massage today.”

“I'm running a tab at the counter the man replies, what ever you say.”

Inside the treatment room Matilda who is an expert deep tissue massage therapist presses downward onto the mans' back harder than a stage coach wagon wheel hitting a huge rock while traveling through a ghost town.

“Ouch!” The stressed out man yells out. “What are you doing woman? I ordered a Swedish massage, not this strong stuff! You know what you're doing?”

S-t-r-e-t-c-h, Matilda pulls on his legs. She twists him like a lasso, then crack goes his back. He grunts releasing his years of bottled up inner tension. Twenty minutes have passed, he says nothing now, only breathes with sighs of relief.

Fifty long minutes later he says in a calm soft voice, “I'll be darn, I haven't felt this good in years. Guess that strong stuff really does agree with me. What in tarnation? How did you know that?”

"Certainly not by the label," Matilda replies in a confident voice. "You are more complex than that!"

Strong Stuff, by Patricia Huff, author and massage therapist, South Pasadena.