Protecting Your Mental Health After a Mass Shooting

The events at the King Soopers in Boulder Monday night, are profoundly sad. Exposure to such a traumatic event hurts everyone in a community, damaging our sense of safety and security even in the most peaceful of times. The latest violence may be triggering to Colorado residents, especially as it comes less than a month away from the 22nd anniversary of Columbine. Combined with the heightened anxiety a year of pandemic living has brought us, we may feel especially vulnerable. This additional trauma may challenge the hopeful feelings that many people are having, as vaccinations rise and a sense of normalcy returns.

In our current environment of 24/7 news coverage, we are continually re-exposed to the traumatic event. As soon as we begin to make sense of the tragedy, a new tidbit is released. This continual stream of information regarding the event further disrupts our balance, challenging the coping mechanisms we use to manage our day-to-day existence.

According to the American Psychological Association, 79% of Americans surveyed in 2019, said they experience stress as a result of the “possibility” of a mass shooting. In this same survey, a third (33%) of respondents said they avoid certain places or events out of fear of mass shootings.

The Center for the Study of Traumatic Stress, warns that persistently feeling unsafe can lead to concerning issues such as “trouble sleeping, irritability, difficulty concentrating, increased use of alcohol and tobacco, social isolation and fear of those around us.”

But here are a few strategies that can help us maintain balance, cope, and continue living. These emotional first aid techniques can be used to help manage the trauma and distress that can occur after a mass shooting. If the trauma and distress are significantly affecting your day-to-day life, a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatric provider can help.

Process your grief first

The trauma of a shooting in a commonplace location like a grocery store erodes our trust of the world around us. Before you talk to children, you must allow your body to process the stress hormone cortisol, produced from the fight or flight response. Emily and Amelia Nagoski's recent book "Burnout and How to Complete the Stress Cycle" offers insight into how our stress response requires a sense of gratitude, connection, and peace to complete itself. They liken it to the feeling you would get if lions were chasing you and someone opens the door to save you. To replicate that feeling, physical activity, and affection in the form of exercise or a 20-second hug from a loved one may be all that you need. Another action that can help relieve anxiety is to tighten every muscle in your body for as long as possible and then letting your body relax to simulate a stress response and the moment when you can let the stress go. Completing the stress cycle may help us calm ourselves enough to help others, like our children, who may be more emotionally traumatized.

Support your children

Before anything else, start with a 20-second hug of your children for all the reasons mentioned earlier. It will help both of you process the trauma better. Children express thoughts and feelings differently than adults, but they are no less traumatized. You may notice that your child may have difficulty focusing, may seem more distracted or have increased nightmares, changed mood, play behavior (e.g., acting out shootings or dying), tantrums, clinginess, or physical ailments.

We must talk to children openly and honestly in an age-appropriate manner and communicate that they can come to you with their fears. If children are under 8 and are unlikely to have exposure to the information, it's probably best not to bring it up. However, with older children, start with their feelings and inquire how they may feel about the latest shooting. Ask if there is anything they want to do to help support victims' families to help them feel a sense of control.

Here's a great video from Channel 9 News if you'd like more specific talking points about what you should say to children.

Take a Break from Media

Limit yourself and your family’s exposure to the news, however you receive it. Whether you check social media, newspapers, magazines, internet, or television give yourself permission to take a break from the news cycle. Overexposure to the news can increase stress, and images of the violent event can re-trigger feelings. Take the time you would normally use for news and instead engage in something you enjoy.

Help others

It may feel awkward and uncomfortable to bring it up, but it’s important to leave the door open for conversation for people to express themselves. Sending a simple text to check-in is a great way to connect as it allows the person to respond when they are ready. You can say, “I’m struggling with the violence that’s being reported on the news. I wanted to check-in with you about how you are feeling?” Please know that some people prefer to avoid the topic altogether, and this is also an appropriate response. Drop the subject if your person is unresponsive but know that the simple act of showing you care means a lot. It may trigger that person to open up to others who can provide them with the emotional first aid they need.

Do check-in later, however. People sometimes need time to process, and your friend may want the support once they do look at their feelings. Once the shock wears off, listen intently. If a friend expresses their feelings of hopelessness, don't say, "oh, you shouldn't feel that way…it's statistically unlikely it will happen again." Minimizing their feelings can put them down a shame spiral of grief that intensifies their feelings of disconnection, rather than helping them to self-regulate and move forward.

Longer-term support

After 9/11, 66% of New York City students experienced moderate symptoms of PTSD, and 30% of parents reported elevated symptoms. In the next few weeks, we may experience feelings of shock, anger, sadness, fear, and helplessness. For people experiencing symptoms that affect daily life, it is important to seek professional help. Reach out to your primary care provider, a mental health provider, or a licensed counselor. These professionals can guide you towards treatments like, trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy that may be helpful. Other evidenced-based techniques like Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), a technique developed for PTSD in adults, can also be used to help children.

And if that's not enough, more escalated treatments like medication management and Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) may be helpful.

Where do we go from here?

Mass shootings are senseless and tragic. It is common to want to return to a sense of normalcy by ignoring negative feelings. However, we do so at the risk of developing more serious mental health issues like clinical depression, substance abuse, and mood disorders. Grief and trauma change us physically and emotionally and we must allow ourselves to heal so that we can build back stronger, more resilient communities.

Please check out the American Psychological Association’s Resource Page for Coping With Mass Shootings for more info.

Also, If you need support, Colorado Crisis Services is available to anyone at 844-493-TALK (8255), or you can text TALK to 38255.