Lake Forest Obituary: Harriet Durand Arpee Sherman, 83

Harriet Durand Arpee Sherman was born June 15, 1936 at Evanston Hospital and transitioned out of body April 6, 2020. Born to Edward Arpee, Lake Forest Historian/Author, and beloved Lake Forest Academy Teacher/Coach, and Katherine Van Wagenen Trowbridge Arpee, Granddaughter of Calvin Durand, Harriet was a fourth generation Durand of Lake Forest.

Harriet was a life-long resident of Lake Forest, having grown up with trees, ravines, four seasons, Lake Michigan, her favorite library, the fountain of Market Square; she retold the family stories and enjoyed the trees of prior generations. Harriet went to Lake Forest Country Day School, nursery school and kindergarten through eighth grade, then Ferry Hall Class of 1954, then attended two years of Smith College in Northhampton, MA, class of 1958, graduating from Northwestern University in 1959 with a Bachelor of Science in Nursing. She later received her Masters degree in Human Relations from Webster College in 1975, Fort Sheridan Program. She was significantly influenced by Mary Breckenridge, of the Frontier Nursing Service of Eastern Kentucky, and enjoyed working 10 years in Labor and Delivery in Lake Forest Hospital and in Evanston Hospital. Her favorite job was with the Chicago Maternity Center; the Stork Teams for home births throughout Chicago. She then worked nightshift at Downey, VA North Chicago Medical Center for 34 years on the PTSD Psychiatric Wards. She visited the commune, the Farm, in Summerton, Tennessee, to continue her interest in obstetrics and mother-baby care after reading the works of Ina Mae Gaskin.

Harriet enjoyed international culture. She was a lover of spiritual exploration, foods, colors, fabrics, art, music, and plants. She filled her home with international variety and stories. She was a happy, lively spirit who loved reading, movies, art, and music.

She had a youthful, playful energy and was beloved by young growing learning creatures and humans. She enjoyed her dogs and cats, and the wildlife in her ravine including real deer and her deer statues.

Harriet was a proponent of natural landscaping, particularly the use of low groundcover-bishops weeds where grass cannot grow, negating the need for chemicals. Ever receptive to the language behind words, Harriet had a talent for perceiving a situation beyond its appearances and identifying the agenda and habitual patterns of intention. As a new RN, her thinking was greatly influenced by a Dr. Albert Ellis Seminar.

Harriet read voraciously from the Essenes to International War Strategies. Her hand-made bumper sticker on her car once said “my other car is a black hawk helicopter.” Ever generous, her kindness and encouragement was not lost on those in need. Harriet was not one to be contained by social ignorance. Her old family lineage and civil war history greatly influenced her. Her father taught her the importance of a woman being self-supporting. Her mother taught her the importance of education. Her other great childhood influences included family friend Lilace Reid Barnes of Glen Rowan; she was fairy Godmother to young Harriet. After Nursing School Harriet traveled to Israel to see Kibbutz because she believed people could live in communal harmony. She traveled to Iran, then to Kashmir, met the father of her children, married in Calcutta, returned to Lake Forest, and eventually divorced. In her later years she traveled to Switzerland, the Amazon, and Alaska.

Harriet was the essence of hoping that the best of people would win the day. She loved exploration, creativity, and growing things.

Architect Steve Lincoln designed her house to resemble a lodge in the Adirondacks.

Harriet loved to sew by hand and has made many ponchos and comforters with great delight and color.

She was content, and loved by family and many friends. She was one of a kind.

Harriet is survived by her older brother Stephen Trowbridge Arpee (Janet) and his family, sons John and David, and three grandsons, and by her three children, Daniel, Julie, and Molly (Chris Abramian), and dear friend Matthew Mitola.

The remembrance will be private.

A celebration of Harriet’s life will take place at her residence at a future date.

This obituary was produced by Sherman Family. The views expressed here are the author’s own.