Fear of going back to school: COVID-19

Our children might be enjoying this time away from school and colleges, but there’s underlying anxiety for both children and their parents. They are afraid and that feeling is understandable. So, how can we cope with this feeling?

Fear is a healthy emotion that protects us from danger. In order to make the right decisions, our brain has to decide which of these two strategies is more effective: face danger or flee from it.

Each of us will have to consider the pros and cons, because each family situation is different. Some parents will have to return to work and will have no choice but to send their children to school while others, teleworking or even unemployed, may choose to stay home with their children.

Those who have the choice of sending their child to school will have to ask the right questions before making a decision. Indeed, some families have specific issues, such as a medical condition or the presence of a person aged 60 and over at home.

Either way, it's up to everyone to determine their level of risk tolerance. However, in this situation, as in all situations that generate anxiety, it is important to consider the benefits and risks to which one is exposed. Doing this exercise can help us make the best decision for our situations and, ultimately, better manage our fears.

In the case of my daughter Lily, this exercise gave the following result. We considered the question, is it a good idea to send Lily back to school?

Benefits:

• Lily misses her friends very much; she needs social stimulation with other children.
• A change of environment for Lily would be helpful.
• She can't wait to go back to school as she bought lots of new school supplies just before the lockdown.

Risks:

• Lily could bring COVID-19 home, but there’s no confirmed COVID-19 cases in the neighbourhood of her school.
• She has two grandparents who are at risk, but we have accepted the fact that we won't see them in person until at least September.

For my daughter, the balance therefore tilts toward the side of benefits. But for many, the scales could tip to the other side. In fact, it is a very personal question for each parent.

The important thing is to be guided by facts, by a rational response, and not by our emotions. To check whether your decision is guided by emotions or facts, here’s a small exercise for you:

Can you look in the mirror and say loudly, “I keep my child at home because the risk is too great, not because I am afraid." If your answer is yes, then you’ve assessed the situation correctly.

Speaking of the facts, I recommend that you follow the government information/guidelines on how the return to class will take place in your state/city.

Unfounded fear disappears over time when facing a situation. However, it can live with you for a long time when the situation is avoided or when the risk is poorly assessed. Of course, as in all the choices we make in our lives, it is also important to remember that there is no such thing as zero risk. Life doesn’t come with guarantees.

Stay safe and take care!