The Strong, Silent Worker

My father was a blue-collar worker.

After years of laboring, he became disabled due to severe arthritis and bursitis in both his arms, hands and legs which limited his physical strength and impeded his ability to walk. During my formative educational years in elementary school, I walked home every day to have lunch that my dad prepared for me. In spite of his disability, my dad’s presence provided a sense of reassurance, protection and comfort. In spite of his disabilities, his presence spoke volumes -- integrity, dependability and the voice of reason.
During his younger and more vibrant years, he accessorized his attire with a cane; it later became a constant dependency. My olfactory senses are still sensitive to the anti-arthritic topical medicine he used, Heat. He earned his position as head of household with all the rights and privileges pertaining thereto. My parents were active members in the United Methodist Church in the early 1950’s and became the first family to integrate the church. Soon thereafter, dozens more became productive parishioners.

I recall that December morning I walked into the house after playing in the backyard. Daddy was sitting on the cedar chest which contained mom’s fabric and sewing materials. He leaned to one side and began making a loud snoring sound. I went into the kitchen and said, “Mom, daddy is snoring really loud!” She walked into the dining room, shook him on the shoulder and called his name, “John! John!” “Oh my God, he’s having a heart attack!” she said as she rushed back into the kitchen to call for an ambulance.
At eight years old, I wasn’t sure what the medical consequences represented. However, I did know for certain that it wasn’t favorable. The ambulance arrived and took him to the hospital. Eleven days later, I was fatherless.

The third Sunday in June is recognized as Father’s Day. It’s a time when we honor fathers, grandfathers, godfathers, stepfathers, uncles, brothers, husbands, and those men who serve as mentors and role models.
Men who embrace their role as an active and responsible father have an awesome responsibility of imparting wisdom, showing children how to love, respecting and caring for others, teaching self-restraint, disciplining, protecting, educating, training them how to become self-sufficient, making wise choices, developing their spiritual lives, providing financial resources, showing them how to become a productive member of society, and how to defend themselves and their families ~ and that’s just the short list!

Fathers instruct with truth

Fathers discipline wisely

Fathers show love

Throughout the year show a greater level of regard for the men who serve in their perspective places. They may not do nor say everything right. However, their role should be respected.
A father is a man who exercises paternal care, provision and protection to his offspring. My personal definition of “daddy/dad” is: a term of endearment given to the responsible man by the child who initiates the fulfillment of the aforementioned and is endorsed by the female counterpart.
Mothers need help in training a pre-pubescent child into a well-rounded man of character. Mothers also need assistance in training their female children and emphasizing the importance of virtue and integrity. In essence, a man’s presence is greater than his presents. Women need assistance with teaching a boy how to become a responsible, loving and a respectful man and teaching a girl how she should be treated. Holding a door open for a woman is not a courtesy, it’s expected. The qualities of chivalry should be a standard and taught consistently.

There is an urgency to defend, uplift and give reverence to those who serve as fathers and role models. We salute all of the men who embrace the blessing of being called “daddy” and honor them for their commitment in favorably molding the hearts and minds of their children.

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This is an abridged version of a previously published article in the June 2018 edition of Grace and Glory Magazine and titled: The Love of a Father, page 16.