Adored Manchester Code Officer Dies 2 Days After 35th Birthday

MANCHESTER, NJ — Nicole Ashkar was known to some as hard-working employee. To others, she was carefree, generous, and a force of joy. To most she was a loving, kind, devoted wife, mother and friend.

Those are the words describing the 35-year-old who was Manchester Township's chief code enforcement officer, as friends and family try to cope with the shock of her untimely passing. She died Friday at Community Medical Center in Toms River of complications of a bacterial infection, just two days after her birthday. Family members wrote in a GoFundme post that her passing was sudden and unexpected.

"Nicole was defined by her love. It radiated from her everywhere she went, and when she smiled, you couldn't help but smile too," her family wrote in her obituary on the Thompson Memorial Home website. The Red Bank funeral home is handling the arrangements. "While many were lucky to know Nicole, the two most blessed by her fierce and limitless love were her husband Rich and their son, Cole."

Ashkar, a 2001 graduate of Lacey Township High School, had worked for the Lacey Township Zoning Commission for 11 years before taking the job in Manchester as a zoning officer in 2013, according to her obituary. She and Richard, a New Jersey State Trooper, met in 2008 and were married on the beach in Punta Cana on May 25, 2013; Cole was born 18 months later. "She enjoyed spending time with family and friends, making Cole laugh, and playing with her beloved dogs, Bolo and Bonnie," the obituary said.

"Rich has always said that Nicole’s life started the day Cole was born," Jennifer Ashkar, Richard's sister, wrote on the GoFundme she started to assist with the medical and funeral expenses following what she described as "a difficult and heartbreaking battle" with a bacterial infection. "I think we’d all agree that Nicole was a caring partner, a devoted friend and a loyal family member, but that loving Cole was her one true calling."

"Nicole performed her job with pride, and she strived each day to make Manchester Township a better place to live for each of our residents," the township's Facebook post read. We’re sure that if you ever had the pleasure of contacting Nicole and her office for assistance, you’d agree."

"Anyone who knew Nicole saw a loving mother and wife, a fun-loving friend, dedicated employee and a good and kind soul," Manchester Mayor Ken Palmer said. "There are some instances in life, where words just do not provide any relief and this is one of them."

The Manchester Township Police Department posted as well, saying "Nicole will be greatly missed by everyone at the Manchester Police Department."

"It’s tough to put into words how we all feel about the tragic and sudden loss," the post said.

Jennifer Ashkar, described Nicole as "a natural mother, proud and kind."

"Cole was her sun, moon, and stars," she wrote.

Nicole Sandra Casale was born in Belleville to Nicholas Casale and Sandra Stellato. In addition to her husband, Rich, and son, Cole, she is survived by her two siblings, Marissa Raimato and her husband Michael Raimato, and Vincent Casale; and her stepmother, Janet Casale. She was a loving aunt to Ava, Michael, Emma, Lilah, and Zoe and godmother to Michael and Logan.

"The loss is unmeasurable, but so is the love you left behind," wrote Melissa Chester, who shared the GoFundme on Facebook. "I hope you can rest in peace, my friend, knowing there is an army of us to help take care of your boys."

"We are so completely heartbroken. Nicole was such a sweet, loving, generous and kind person, she will be missed by so many," the condolence message from Bob and Lisa Scott said.

"She was a wonderful, carefree, loving person. Always had a smile and a hello," Ronald Rhein said.

"She was a force of joy, such a positive being, she lifted everybody she met and just being in her presence made others happier," Rachael Kanapka wrote.

The GoFundme set up to help pay off Nicole's medical and funeral expenses had raised more than $39,000 of its $45,000 goal as of Tuesday afternoon.

"Any remaining funds will be used to provide ongoing support for Cole Ashkar so that he can live the happy and full life Nicole wanted for him," Jennifer Ashkar wrote. (Click here to contribute.)

Funeral services for Nicole Ashkar are as follows, according to the Thompson Memorial Home website:

Visitation will be held on Wednesday, May 2, 2018 from 2 to 4 p.m. and 7 to 9 p.m. at the Thompson Memorial Home, 310 Broad Street, Red Bank. A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated on Thursday, May 3, 2018 at 10 a.m. at Saint James Roman Catholic Church, 94 Broad Street, Red Bank, NJ 07701. Interment will follow at Mt. Olivet Cemetery in Middletown.

Photo collage via GoFundme