Grieving Family Helped By Summit Grief Center Founded By CNN Hero

SUMMIT, NJ — Casey Holstein and his family might be in a very different place if not for Mary Robinson.

Holstein's wife, Robin died of breast cancer in 2007. The loss was devastating for him and their daughters, Charli and Lia. Charli was 11 when her mother died, and Lia was 9.

To help him and his daughters cope with the loss, Holstein went to Good Grief, a counseling center in Summit Mary Robinson founded in 2003.

"It was instrumental in carving a path of survival for my family," Holstein said. "When tragedies like this occur, people often feel they are the only ones who are going through it. It afforded us the chance to see that we were not the only ones going through what we went through."

Robinson founded Imagine, A Center for Coping with Loss in Mountainside in 2011.

Recently, Robinson was named a CNN Hero of the Year, one of just 10 people to receive the annual honor. Robinson and the nine other nominees will be featured on "CNN Heroes: An All-Star Tribute" Dec. 8 at 8 p.m. on CNN.

Whether or not she is voted CNN Hero of the Year or not, Mary Robinson, who founded Imagine, a center that provides free support for grieving children, is a hero to many.

Robinson, who lost her father at the age of 14, founded the Imagine center to help kids deal with grief. Imagine, based in Mountainside, offers free year-round grief support groups for children age 3-18 who have had a parent or brother or sister die, and for families caring for a family member living with a life-altering physical illness.

"Loss is a part of life, but nobody teaches us what do you do when you have all these feelings," Robinson told CNN. "My goal is to help kids develop coping tools and creative supportive communities that can support anybody who is grieving."

At Imagine, Robinson helps children to express their emotions in healthy ways in the "Volcano Room," a place where they are free to scream, punch pillows, and rip books.

Holstein and his daughters went to Robinson's first counseling center, Good Grief, for three years.

"The kids were angry because they felt ripped off that they had lost their mom," Holstein said. "The group helped us build the skills to get through it all, and gave us a network of families going through the same thing.

"The kids could see others living the same nightmare and Mary brought peace and calm to a turbulent, emotional time," Holstein said.

Holstein, Charli, and Lia spoke about their loss on a 2010 Sesame Workshop special "When Families Grieve."

The experience of being helped the way he was made Holstein want to pay it forward. Holstein changed careers from helping lawyers process lawsuits to founding SYNERGY HomeCare of Metro NJ 18 months after his wife died. The caregiver service helps the elderly live comfortably as they get older.

"Mary's support group gave me the ability to truly listen and have compassion for people grieving the loss of a loved one," Holstein said. "Whether it's a senior whose spouse is sick or dying or drifting away in dementia, I understand the pain."

Holstein's children are thriving too. Charli is a junior at Tulane University studying international development and public health. Lia is a freshman at the University of Wisconsin studying communications.

"They are well-adjusted kids, and I think had we not gone down this road, they would have been self-destructive and angry," Holstein said. "And angry people do stupid things."

Related: South Orange Family Featured in Primetime Sesame Workshop Special

"We are thrilled but not surprised Mary has been selected," said Imagine Board Chair John Toriello. "Having served on the board since Imagine's inception in 2011, I know Mary is an outstanding and dedicated leader who makes and has made an enormous contribution in helping grieving children and families. We are very proud of her."

While Imagine made it to the Top Ten CNN Hero category, officials noted they can use your vote to make it to the Hero of the Year which would result in a donation of $100,000 for Imagine and a global spotlight on the need and importance of supporting grieving youth. You can vote ten times a day every day for Mary at www.cnnheroes.com.

"This award means we are able to shine an even bigger spotlight on our mission of supporting children, teens, young adults, and their families, who are coping with loss due to death or illness," said Robinson. "In NJ alone there are currently over 114,000 bereaved youth who have had a parent die. Nationally the number is over 4.9 million. At Imagine over 430 children and adults from 59 towns across New Jersey attend our support groups every two weeks in Mountainside and Newark. However, serving 430 people at our centers is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of youth needing support. Therefore, our mission also includes a focus on education, to make sure wherever a grieving child or teen turns in their life, there is an adult who pays attention and understands the need to provide support and to listen. Our goal is to create grief-informed communities, school districts, agencies, workplaces, and neighborhoods in New Jersey and nationally."

To schedule an orientation for yourself or your family or for more information contact Imagine at 908-264-3100 or info@imaginenj.org.

"Volunteering and working in the field of Children's Grief Support since 1997, I am so honored to receive this award," said Robinson.

This post contains reporting by Dan Hubbard.

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