Dementia Doesn't Stop Sweet, 39-Year Valentine’s Day Tradition

ALBUQUERQUE, NM — Some day, 74-year-old Donna Kramer may forget her sweetheart as dementia, a condition she was diagnosed with four years ago, continues its cruel toll. But her husband, Ron Kramer, 77, won’t forget her. Every year since the couple started dating in 1979, he gives her a Valentine’s Day gift of dark chocolate creme candies from a gourmet shop in Albuquerque.

But they don’t come in any old box. Each year, Donna’s doting husband returns the decorative tin to Buffet’s Candies for a refill.

Ron and Donna met on Jan. 2, 1979, when he showed up at her door to try to sell her an insurance policy. He had been divorced for five years and she was going through one. Donna answered the door in a pair of “Big Bird” slippers and her robe.

“I was really sexy,” Donna told KOAT-TV.

By Valentine’s Day, the chance encounter had blossomed into love and Ron presented her with the Buffet chocolates. They married on May 8, 1979.

Donna’s dignity began slipping away four years ago in ways that ultimately made it impossible for her to care for herself. In August 2015, Ron moved his wife to an assisted living facility.

“And that was probably the saddest day of my life,” he told the television station.

Ron visits every day, always with some sweet treat — a small bottle of Coca-Cola, a piece of gum or strawberries, raspberries or pineapple, he told ABC News. He’s only missed three days since she moved to the facility, when he took a trip to Nebraska to see his 96-year-old aunt.

For now, Donna remembers Ron, the love they share and the fun they’ve had over the past 39 years. She called him “a keeper,” and told KOAT she loves him as much today as she did when they got married.

But some of Donna’s memories are gone, and Ron knows what’s coming. The inevitability is a reminder to everyone to seize each day.

"She's going to forget who I am," he told KOAT. "So enjoy every minute you can have with them while they still remember you."

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