How Hicksville Elementary Schools Are Tackling The Bully Menace

HICKSVILLE, NY — "Nice shoes," one Hicksville student said sarcastically to another, who cringed and hurried past. "I like my shoes," another replied as he got the dig. When the bully tried that same put-down on another student, a classmate intervened, stepping in to support the would-be victim.

Fortunately, this time it was just a skit designed to heighten awareness about bullying, part of a new anti-bullying initiative launched at each Hicksville elementary school. The district recently launched the Olweus Bully Prevention Program, as it's called, to help prevent and reduce the bully menace that plagues thousands of students across the country.

It's a familiar scene for kids around the country, often seen on the playground or in the lunchroom. Bullies humiliate and harass, exclude and excoriate. They often seek a quick laugh at the expense of another.

As part of a national reporting project, Patch has been looking at society's roles and responsibilities in bullying and a child's unthinkable decision to end their own life in hopes we might offer solutions that save lives.

As we learned in our ongoing "Menace of Bullies" reporting project, the frontal lobes of adolescent and teen brains — where reasoning and emotions are managed — aren't fully developed. Kids who bully tend to act with little consideration or regard for the harm they are causing or how severely their victims may react. One in three are bullied — far more than many care to admit — and the toll is enormous. Bullying leads to truancy, with as many as 160,000 kids choosing to stay home from school every day to avoid their tormentors. Some even take their own lives, resorting to a drastic, permanent solution to a temporary — and often fixable — problem.

Dubbed the most-researched and widely-known bullying prevention program available to educators, the Olweus program has been proven to prevent and reduce bullying in schools. The program is designed for students in elementary, middle and junior high schools. It involves not only all students, but also every adult in the building who wants to be included. Monitors, greeters, clerical workers and even custodians, for example, also receive anti-bullying training under the program. The idea is also to create a unified approach to bullying that uses the same language and can be followed district-wide.

Anthony Lubrano, a former principal at Old Country Road Elementary School who is in his second year as assistant superintendent for curriculum and instruction, told Patch in a phone interview Thursday the district's curriculum council reviewed various anti-bullying programs and settled on Olweus because it's people-oriented and offers a community aspect.

"There's different pieces to the puzzle to include as many people as possible," he said. "We didn't see that with other programs that were kid-based."

Ahead of the January kick-off event staff members at each of the district's seven elementary schools received anti-bullying training, learning how to properly intervene during suspected bullying. Oftentimes, adults don't know exactly what to say or how to intervene. Under the new program, bullies and their victims aren't put in the same room, as has often been the case.

"It's uncomfortable and the child who is being bullied may feel as though they've done something wrong," Lubrano said. "And we also want to support the child who is allegedly bullying because very often they're insecure themselves and they're acting out. Both sides need support from the school."

As for students, the program calls for giving them classroom lessons — known as circles — that focus on building a positive classroom climate where they respect each other's differences, promote acceptance, build peer relationships and serve the community. While it's an anti-bullying program, the district seeks to build a community of so-called "upstanders," rather than bystanders, where students feel confident to step in, stand-up and support their classmates.

"We want them to be upstanders," Lubrano said. "We want to empower children to speak up if they see something that they don't find comfortable or that they recognize as bullying. It's difficult for children to do."

Students also took a "Kindness Pledge" with four key promises:

• Don't bully others.
• Try to help students who are bullied.
• Try to include students who are left out.
• If someone is being bullied, tell an adult at school and an adult at home.

The district passed out a baseline questionnaire to students in grades 3-5 to give the district an idea of where it's at with the bully menace. Students got to share their experiences with bullying, as well as their thoughts and feelings. That same survey will be passed out each fall to see whether bullying incidents decrease.

"That is going to be our metric, our way of measuring the program's success in addition to anecdotal information," Lubrano said.

Community feedback is also important. While parents don't participate in the survey, bullying happens outside the school, too, particularly with cyberbullying. The internet and social media are intertwined with how kids communicate and meet, and it intensifies the torment that victims feel. The hurtful scenarios playing out on their screens have all the allure of reality TV, only the online drama is more appealing because they know the people involved.

When parents bring that information to the district's attention, the school gets involved and that information factors into the overall assessment.

It could take a couple years for the Olweus program and its culture of upstanders to become fully stitched into the district's fabric and culture. At that point, if the curriculum panel review doesn't see some improvements with bullying, it could decide to go in a different direction.

"We don't want to remain static and say, 'just because we bought into this, we're going to stay with it forever," Lubrano said."

Do you have a story to tell? Are you concerned about how your local schools handle bullies and their victims?

Email us at bullies@patch.com and share your views in the comments.

Selected stories from The Menace of Bullies project

• Bullied To Death: When Kids Kill With Words
• When Coaches Bully: It Happens To Millions Of Youth Athletes
• Free School Laundromats Boost Self-Esteem
• Women Defy Body Shamers, Take Pride In Long Fingernails
• Teen Died By Suicide; Bullying Over Sexuality Killed Him: Mom
• America's Shameful Truth About School Shooters And Bullying
• Cyberbullying Most Often Affects Girls; These Women Are Trying To Stop It
• Bullying Kids: Straighten Up, Or Your Parents May Have To Pay Up
• 'The Hero Myth': Why Expecting Kids To Fight Bullies Is Harmful
• 'Mr. Anti-Bully': Reformed Bully, 12, Sets Mistake Right