Loved Ones, Community Pay Heartfelt Tribute To Donald Griffin

WESTHAMPTON BEACH, NY — The many who loved him gathered Friday night at the Westhampton Beach Fire Department to bid heartfelt farewell to Donald Griffin.

He will be forever remembered as a beloved teacher, firefighter, and veritable pillar of the community.

A prayer service held at the firehouse was led by Fr. Michael Ralph of St. Mark's Episcopal Church and included a reading by Trey McAnelly, pastor of the Westhampton Presbyterian Church from 2006 to 2006.

"During the course of my tenure I was graciously ingrafted into the family of the Westhampton Beach Fire Department, which became, and remains, my second family," McAnelly said, adding that he thanked May Griffin and Don's family for being allowed to "walk with you at this station of your life's journey," something he considered a great honor.

"I owe Don an extreme debt of gratitude," McAnelly said. "Someone once said, 'People know what they do, people usually know why they do what they do, but very rarely do people know what they do — does."

McAnelly said when he first met Don, "he made it clear not who he was but how he was. He maintained a standard, as a Westhampton Presbyterian Church board of trustees member, a patriarch in the community, an educator, and a member of the fire department. I had to measure up. . . Respect was something to be earned. If it weren't for Don's example, I think I would be very challenged to be someone who, hopefully, might be worthy of respect. He put his signature on my heart."

McAnelly then read a passage from the Book of Revelations.

Don Griffin was remembered by his fire department family as a man who wanted, not to have a long line of people passing by his family, saying, "I'm sorry for your loss." Instead, he said, "Tell them a story about the time we spent together."

Warm memories and stories shared at the service reflected a life filled with love for his wife, his family, including his four precious children and beloved seven grandchildren. "You have no idea how many proud Pop Pop stories I've heard over the years," one fire department friend said.

Donald Griffin once worked at Schwenk's Dairy in Southampton, taught biology at Westhampton Beach High School, where he was a coach known affectionately as "Mr. Green Jeans." He and his beloved wife May sold daffodils during the Easter season at Westhampton Presbyterian Church; he was also deeply devoted to the Westhampton Beach Fire Department, where he served for 50 years on the interview committee, as a warden, driver — his truck 7-8-4, was proudly standing by at the service — the department treasurer, on the fire safety committee, an as a member of the fire police.

When he rubbed his face, friends remembered, he might not agree, but he was always calm — and he was usually right.

Don and May shared a life of forever love, at the beach, camping at Cathedral Pines, Smith Pt. and Meschutt. Don, friends said, could usually be found in the dunes picking beach plums for May's famous jam; he was remembered as a Pop Pop who'd take his grandchildren to buy fudge before they'd sit under the famous Frankenbach tree to watch the July 4 parade — and then head for a picnic at the Shinnecock Canal.

Jenna Klepper and all his grandchildren shared memories of their grandfather in a loving tribute, which she read at the service; it follows in its entirety:

"As the firstborn grandchild, I was referred to as 'girlfriend #1' by my Pop Pop. He gave me many things over the years, and I believe his love of story-telling was one of them.

"When I was really young, prior to my cousins or even my sister being born, I remember Pop Pop pulling me to the side and into his room, proudly pointing at the frames hanging on the wall on his side of the bed. The first read, 'If mom says no, ask grandmother.' The one directly to the right of that frame read, 'If all else fails, ask grandfather.' He then turned to me and said, 'Do you understand what that means?' Now, being as young as I was, I honestly can’t remember if I was even the one who read those pictures, or what I had asked Nana for and had already been told 'no,' but I do remember that I was taught at an early age that asking multiple adults was not the right way to approach things. I looked at my Pop Pop, who had his arm around my shoulder, crouched down low, and holding me tight, and said, 'Nope!' He looked at me and said, 'It means you can ask me, and I’ll say yes.'

"That was the kind of man he was — he wanted his family to be happy. We all knew that he was the one to go to when we were sick, and even as I got older and was in middle or high school, if we didn’t feel well, he was the one to pick us local grandchildren up from school, or stop over to take care of us. If any of us stayed overnight at the house, we knew we were safe. If we were sick, we would walk to his side of the bed and he would be up and in action, with a bucket, before we could say anything. Alyssa said it beautifully: 'He was my lifeline. If I had a problem, I just called Pop Pop because he always knew what to do.'

"Pop Pop willingly ran into fires, literally; he was proud of what he did and enjoyed sharing it with his family. Jake remembers riding in the car with him as a kid as he would point out places in town where there had been fires and having so many stories to tell about them. He loved telling stories, not just about his fires, but his stories in general about his students, friends, coaching, etc. I think his love for storytelling was instilled in all of us.

He sat through countless 'school lessons' in his garage, and proudly wore his 'Grandpa to bee' hat for months prior to the birth of each grandchild. It’s how as the oldest grandchild, I always knew I was getting a new cousin. He is the reason we all love the water so much, because his love of the water was shared with each of his children and grandchildren. Taylor and David both fondly remember all the time they spent at the beach. He taught both of them how to safely navigate the ocean, and taught Taylor the importance of diving under the waves.

Pop Pop taught us that if you are willing to work hard, you can accomplish anything. Before any of us were born, he turned down an offer to be in the MLB to graduate from college, become a teacher, and even held a second job as a milkman. His determination was instilled in each of us, Griffin especially, who earned his Eagle Scout rank, with the help and guidance from Pop Pop. During his Eagle Scout ceremony, he bestowed the mentor badge to Pop Pop for inspiring him and being a significant influence on his achieving the highest rank possible in the Boy Scouts.

"One of my biggest fans, he was at nearly every swim meet and performance, even the ones in a house, sitting right alongside my parents, encouraging me to go after it. Not only that, but being a local umpire, coach, and teacher meant that going out for even the paper was a 30-minute ordeal. Matt remembers that any and every errand meant they would run into someone. He would joke, 'Pop Pop, you’re a celebrity down here!' He always denied it and told Matt to stop joking around, but then they’d run into someone else.

"On top of all this, he was one of the most patient people I knew. I never saw him get truly mad, or even raise his voice, except to call us back to the camper for supper. He even took the time to teach me how to be a catcher like him, which is no easy feet, considering my eye-hand coordination is less than stellar. Not to mention when I was a moody teenager, he gave me 'happy pills' — don’t worry, they were jelly beans in an old vitamin bottle — because his family and his happiness were his number one priority.

"I think we all remember the smallest moments with our Pop Pop — the loud whistle he did so well, the trips to pick strawberries and eating as many in the fields as we brought home, the packs of Big Red gum we chewed until our tongue was numb, the campouts, the fire pits, decorating for the holidays, croquet in the yard, playing Mexican train dominoes, running through the sprinkler, and sneaking us onto the fire truck during the St Patrick’s Day parade, to name a few.

"He always opted for root beer and didn’t so much as touch a drop of alcohol in his entire life. He taught us that there is no such thing as too much ice cream and hands down, he scooped the best ice cream cone.

Throughout it all, rather than getting mad, frustrated, or anything along those lines when any of us did anything 'crazy,' he would simply tell us, 'It’s a good thing I love you.' So Pop Pop, from all the grandchildren, 'It’s a good thing we love you. See you later, alligator."

Donald Griffin died on March 31 at his home in Westhampton Beach after losing his fight with cancer. He was 84 at the time of his death and would have been married 62 years on April 21.

Interment will take place Saturday, April 6 at 11 a.m., with a procession to leave the Werner-Rothwell Funeral Home, located at 60 Mill Rd. in Westhampton Beach, at 10 a.m., to the Southampton Cemetery on North Sea Rd. in Southampton.

According to his obituary, Donald Griffin was born on December 11, 1943 in Southampton, NY. "He attended Southampton Public Schools, graduating in 1952. Excelling in sports, Don was the catcher on the 1951 baseball team, when Southampton won the Suffolk County Championship for the first time.

He graduated from Cortland State College in 1956 with a degree in health education. After graduation, he accepted a job teaching science in Westhampton Beach, where he started in the junior high school, and eventually taught biology in the high school, where he remained until his retirement 36 years later.

In 1957, Don married his high school 'sweetheart' May Frankenbach. They moved to Westhampton Beach where they raised their four children. Don loved teaching and coaching, including such sports as baseball and soccer. He also umpired baseball games for many years and kept the clock at basketball and wrestling matches. He was a member of the Westhampton Presbyterian Church for many years and served on the session as well as the trustees and deacons.

After his marriage, his second life commitment was to the Westhampton Beach Fire Department, where he served as a volunteer for over 60 years. During his time he was the President of the Benevolent Association, Treasurer, Driver, Fire Police and was a Fire Education Instructor. Other firemen often joked that he slept in his clothes, because he was usually the first responder to arrive at the firehouse.

Having a family was a priority, but having fun was important, too. He enjoyed boating and going to the beach with his family. Don and May also loved to travel and were avid campers who started in a tent and then eventually owned a Winnebago motorhome. Don and May were proud to boast that they slept in every state except Hawaii.

Don is survived by his wife, May and four children. Gail Klepper and husband Mark of Remsenburg, Greg Griffin of Southampton, Gaye Bugenhagen and husband Jay of Annapolis and Gini Wagner and husband Bryan of East Quogue. His brother Graham lives in Bridgehampton. He was also the proud PopPop to seven grandchildren (Jenna, Alyssa, David, Matt, Jake, Taylor and Griffin)."

In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made in his memory to those charities close to his heart:
- Westhampton Beach Fire Department Benevolent Fund – mailed via check
- Westhampton Beach Fire Department Scholarship Fund – mailed via check
- The Hurricane Education Foundation – available online here.