Feds Demolish Millions Of Future NCAA Brackets: Patch Morning Take

Feds Bench 4 NCAA Coaches For Bribing Scheme

If your alma mater is listed below, apologies in advance for rubbing salt in the wound this morning. Basketball coaches from Arizona, Auburn, Oklahoma State and Southern California were charged Tuesday for a lot of shady business. The coaches allegedly paid students to commit to certain colleges and also accepted bribes to steer athletes to use certain financial advisers. Turns out, the wiretap investigation has been in the works for years and the NCAA had no clue.

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Wanted: New Equifax CEO Who Understands Cyber Security

And speaking of salt in the wound, new reports claim ex-Equifax CEO Richard Smith was allowing out-of-date software with known security weaknesses to be used during his time in charge. That means the release of personal data belonging to 143 million Americans was avoidable. Yes, really. Say it ain't so Smith, say it ain't so.

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Who Needs Water When You're Drowning In Debt?

President Trump delivered a press conference Tuesday with Prime Minister Rajoy of Spain, but he spent a good chunk of the time defending his response to the Puerto Rico disaster. Missed that tweet? The president pointed out that the island owes billions of dollars to Wall Street while many residents are still unable to find food and clean water in the aftermath of Hurricane Maria. Then he reminded us that he will be visiting Puerto Rico next week. Let's just say we're wondering how warm that welcome will be based on this...

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Heaven Help Us If Twitter Makes This Happen

While I'm saddened to call this impactful news, it is. Twitter is testing a longer limit on the amount of characters you can include in a tweet, doubling the current limit of 140 to 280. That's right. Double the political commentary, double the chance of offending people and double the time people will be spending at their computer crafting just the right tweet. Here's what Twitter co-founder and CEO Jack Dorsey has to say about it.

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"Fixer Upper" Fans Are Shiplap Out Of Luck

HGTV stars Joanna and Chip Gaines announced that they will not be filming another season of their hit show "Fixer Upper." Queue the stream of dramatic memes from die-hard home rehab fans on Twitter and jokes about shiplap. If you feel like this right now:

Don't worry. Joanna just wants you to know that this is the real reason they are calling it quits.

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Suffering From The Stink? You're Not Alone

It's about to be stink bug season in 41 states, and judging by the attention this story is getting, people are really darn worried about those little suckers. Luckily there's a group of researchers at Virginia Tech looking out for locals and sharing their wisdom on how to get rid of stink bugs naturally. Watch this gross-yet-handy how-to video if you're looking for answers:

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Off The Beaten Patches

• A terrifying interview: Otto Warmbier's parents open up about son's torture by North Korea (Fox News)
• Another major setback for Trump: Controversial former judge Roy Moore won Alabama’s Republican Senate nomination on Tuesday (The Huffington Post)
• Spoiler alert: Even CNN is talking about the season premiere of "This Is Us'" (CNN)

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Top photo credit: Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images