Julian Raymond 'Ray' Sparrow Jr., 58, of Oakton

»Information from the Money and King Funeral Home and Cremation Services website.

On June 18, 2015, Julian Raymond Sparrow, Jr. (Ray) passed away at the age of 58 at home in Oakton, VA, after a long, courageous battle with kidney cancer.

Ray is survived by his wife Mary Ireland Sparrow, children Raymond (and fiancée Lara Ebert), Kerry, Christine and William; mother Marlene Rideout; father J. Raymond Sparrow and wife Melba; sisters Michele Sparrow and Melanie (Tom) Bills, nephews Lee and Stuart; and a host of close relatives and friends.

Ray was a proud graduate of North Carolina State University and the University of North Carolina School of Law.

A wake will be held on Tuesday, June 23 from 7 to 9 pm at St. Mark’s Catholic Church, 9970 Vale Road, Vienna, VA 22181. A memorial service will take place at St. Mark’s on Wednesday, June 24 at 11 am.

In lieu of flowers, Ray would be honored if donations were made in his memory to: the Jimmy V Foundation for Cancer Research, 106 Towerview Court, Cary, NC 27513, or The Johns Hopkins Kimmel Cancer Center, 750 E. Pratt Street, Suite 1700, Baltimore, MD 21202.

A good friend commented on Ray’s Facebook page that “Ray was absolutely the most consistently positive person I have ever met.” And that is the truth. Ray was a man of incredible good humor who looked for the positive in every situation. He was a loving and caring husband, father, son, brother, uncle, nephew, cousin, brother-in-law, and friend, who never met a stranger.

One of Ray’s many passions was planning family vacations. Billing himself, often and loudly, as “The World’s Greatest Vacation Planner,” he traveled along with various family members to destinations near and far, including Alaska, Australia, New Zealand, Ireland, Spain, Hawaii and Myrtle Beach.

Ray enjoyed volunteering for his kids’ elementary school field trips, and was always proud to return home to tell his wife that he was “the only dad on the bus.” Sometimes this meant that the more rowdy students were assigned to his group, yet those students turned into model citizens while under Mr. Sparrow’s care. He was drafted to play Santa Claus at the school holiday craft fair when his oldest child was in 4th grade, and he returned for the next 20 years, long after his children had graduated. He was an extraordinary Santa Claus not only in appearance but also in spirit.

Ray was well known throughout the community for his coaching skills in a variety of youth sports. Winning was never the goal. The coveted Coach Sparrow game ball was given not only to the player who hit a home run but also to the player who tried like heck to make a play, regardless of the outcome. Ray’s positive demeanor and encouraging words never deserted him no matter how disastrously a game might be going. Having fun was always the most important lesson, and his players can attest that they always had fun playing for Coach Sparrow. He believed in equal playing time no matter the talent level of his players (the only exception was for his own children — they always got less time — a situation often brought to his attention by his wife, with no change in the result).

Ray loved playing golf with his friends and joked that a true hero was not a man who played golf on Father’s Day, but a man who managed to play golf on Mother’s Day, which he always did. He looked forward to attending the Masters Tournament in Augusta every year, where his first order of business was to clear out the gift shop for souvenirs for friends, family, and later, the many health care professionals who joined him on his journey. There are many members of the medical community who now proudly wear a Masters hat or carry a Masters ball marker on their golf rounds.

Sports played a huge role in Ray’s life. He was a member of the freshman basketball team at North Carolina State University in the early 1970s during the David Thompson era. He was an avid supporter of the Capitals, Wizards and Nationals. Like so many of us, Ray still held out hope that the Washington football team would return to its past glory. Later in life he became a fan of NASCAR and especially of Danica Patrick. When Danica sent Ray a personalized video telling him to “keep fighting,” she solidified her place in the hearts of his family and friends. Ray cherished all of the posts made by his supporters on his Go Daddy Sparrow Facebook page.

Finally, we remember Ray’s incredible passion for life. He lived every day with tremendous enthusiasm and optimism that made those around him feel special. He was a great storyteller who never let the truth get in the way of a good story. He made us laugh, and in the end he made us cry. Ray will be missed by all who were fortunate enough to know and love him.