Facebook’s COO Encourages Women to ‘Lean In’ to Make Gains

Facebook’s Chief Operating Officer Sheryl Sandberg visited Stanford University Tuesday night in just one of many stops on her book tour to implore women—and men—to begin conversations about the gender bias in the workplace and society.

With references to her book, "Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead,” Sandberg, also an Atherton resident, unapologetically highlighted the absence of women in many senior level positions. No progress has been made in the past 10 years in corporate America, Sandberg said. Boardrooms are still overwhelmingly male as they were a decade ago. 

“As men become more successful, they are liked more by men and women. As women become more successful, they are liked less by men andwomen,” said Sandberg, who Forbes Magazine named one of the world’s most powerful women.

She punctuated her joint research with Stanford’s Clayman Institute for Gender Research with anecdotes from friends and colleagues at Facebook.

“When my friend told her five-year-old daughter that, she didn’t say that was unfair,” Sandberg said. “She said she would be less successful so she could be liked more.”

To combat this “likeability penalty” that women pay, Sandberg passionately argued for more awareness—by both men and women—of this gender bias and to adjust behavior.

After a task, when asked how well they performed, men tended to incorrectly self-rate themselves higher than they did, and women a little lower, Sandberg said. Men attributed their success to their skills; women to hard work, others’ help and a little luck.

Sandberg exposed her own tendencies of less self-confidence than men in a personal anecdote:

In a Facebook meeting, when Sandberg and a male colleague finally convinced the group to go with the pair's decision, Sandberg was elated and shared her initial concern about not arriving at the same place.

The male colleague said, “I knew all along they’d come around.”

But Sandberg wasn’t always a self-labeled feminist. In fact, two and a half years ago just before she began writing her book, she never said the word “woman” in order to avoid drawing attention to her gender.

But after more than a decade of managing people and noticing inequities, Sandberg said she had to speak out.

“It takes courage to walk into these debates about gender quality. And into this rocky terrain Sheryl has walked,” said Stanford Professor Shelley Correll in her introduction of Sandberg. Correll serves as the Director of the Clayman Institute for Gender Research, which hosted Sandberg as the third annual Jing Lyman lecturer.

The Institute has launched a new online curriculum called "Voice & Influence" that was produced with LeanIn.Org, a new nonprofit organization founded by Sandberg with the goal of encouraging and supporting women in their careers. 

During the Q&A portion of the lecture, an attendee asked what Sandberg thought about Yahoo! CEO Marissa Mayer’s decision to end employees’ option to telecommute.

Skirting any judgment about her ex-Google colleague’s business decision, Sandberg quickly pointed to the media scrutiny of Mayer for this decision simply because she is a woman.

BestBuy did the same thing, but no one was criticizing them, she said. One female CEO’s decision about employee flexibility effectively represented all female CEOs.

“But if we have more women leaders, we associate leadership qualities with women and judge them as individuals.”

To another woman who asked Sandberg for advice on how to balance ambition with the desire to start a family:

“Women sit back and make compromises, waiting for something they’re not even ready for yet,” Sandberg said. “Make the hard choices when you actually have to make them.”

And finally, Sandberg encouraged the audience to “aim high. You can always take a step back if you need to.”

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