A Mom, A Bridge and Two Suicides Thwarted

PALOS PARK, IL — The moment Steve Miller heard what his mother had done, it felt strangely familiar.

Witnesses describe Cathy Miller as "amazing" in the moment she grabbed a suicidal man "with such ferocity, and just wouldn't let go," talking him out of jumping from a bridge — just as someone had done for her son 13 years earlier.

Police saved his life that day. But on Aug. 21, his mom saved another's in that same place.

"I'm just really proud," Miller said of his mother. "To have my mom recognize what was happening at the time, I’m just really proud.”

Modest about her effort that day, Cathy Miller told Patch she simply wanted to get that 19-year-old talking for a moment, to pull him out of despair and back to the present. She wasn't thinking of what would happen if she failed — though that thought hit her later — only that she had to do something.

"If you can help someone for a few minutes, to hold on until they can get some more help — anybody can help for a little bit of time," she said. "And from there, you can get more help."

For years, it was the talking that was difficult for her son. And the trying made the difference.

First Signs of Trouble

The Millers first felt the ripple of mental illness when Steve was 15, swinging from one intense mood to another.

He couldn't get out of bed. His moods were erratic and extreme, oscillating between dispassionate to utterly distressed.

"It was very scary," she said of her her son's struggles. "I did see the mood swings all along, but I just thought it was teenage mood swings. He was either having a really bad day or really good day."

He began seeing a therapist and was prescribed medication for a diagnosis of depression and anxiety.

"It took a long time for him to be open about it," Cathy said, so no one knew the depth of his troubles.

High school graduation was a boiling point. His friends were graduating, but due to a complication with transferring credits from his time at Marian Catholic to Stagg High School, he technically fell short of graduation requirements.

"It was a weird time for me to figure out what my purpose was," he said. "So things were a little bit dark."

His perceived stagnation as others moved forward pushed him to the edge of that bridge on 123rd Street, on June 30, 2003.

It just all seemed like too much, he told Patch.

The Phone Call that Night

It was late, probably around midnight, when the phone rang at the family's Palos Park home. Cathy answered, but Steve asked to talk to his brother. She looks back on the gesture as a thoughtful one.

"He was trying to protect me and keep me from knowing about it," she said. "He wanted my other son to go find him. He didn’t want me to come there."

Steve's brother and police were able to persuade him out of doing himself harm that night, but his battle with mental health has continued. Now 31, he is husband to Liz, and father to children Corey, 5, and Cayden, who turns 2 later this month. He turned a hobby of brewing beer into a career and opened SlapShot Brewing Co.

By appearances, he has life all figured out now.

"Over the past five-six years, it’s been a daily struggle to figure out how to cope with it," Miller said, regarding his depression.

He continues therapy and medication. He speaks as an advocate for mental health awareness and volunteers with the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. He will participate in the foundation's Out of the Darkness Walk in October. (You can find his fundraising page here.)

The day he heard about the young man at the bridge, he had just made the decision to step back from his business in interest of prioritizing his mental health. The reminder of where he once stood reassured him that he was making the right call.

The moment also brought his mother renewed commitment to helping others. She provided the man's mother with her son's contact information should he ever want to reach out to someone who's been there.

“It’s as simple as asking them, can you talk to them for just a minute?" Cathy said. "Just distract them for a minute, and that might be all it takes. Even for a moment.”

Lead photo, Steve Miller | Courtesy of Steve Miller

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