A Love Letter To Brian

To celebrate Valentine’s Day, we asked Patch readers to write a love letter to that special someone and let us deliver it. This is Lisa Graber’s love letter to her husband, Brian:

Hi Bri -

We’ve been married almost 17 years now and of course at this point, Valentine’s Day is more “just another day” that we have to run kids to choir or game club than it is a night to get the grill fired up with some Casey’s steaks on it. So, in the midst of our crazy, busy, typical suburban lives, let me take some time out of it all to actually let you know what you mean to me.

First of all, how on earth you put up with all of us is worthy of a trophy. And by us, let me clarify: me, a full-time perfectionistic teacher; two tweens who -- however precious they may be -- have their moments; Millie and Belle, two rescue dogs, because I can’t ever seem to know where to draw the line on bringing chaos into our house; and Mittens, because our daughter wanted a cat. Suffice it to say, you put up with a lot. And for some unexplained reason, you seem to be quite content with this extreme daily dose of crazy in your life.

While I’m thinking about it, it’s not just that you are a happy camper in these extreme situations, it’s that you carry a sense of calm and humor in your back pocket and can find a way to see the good in any situation. School is stressing me out? It’s Thursday, and you remind me that we’ve almost made it to the weekend. Our daughter is hitting those moody teen years? You swing her right out of those moods with a corny dad joke and an invitation to snuggle on the couch and watch the Cubs. Belle is barking incessantly at the FedEx truck? You scoop her into your arms like a baby and the two of you look at me like, “What more could you want besides these cute faces?” And most of all, somehow, in what seems like the darkest moments, you wrap your arms around me and I can tell that everything really will be okay.

I wish I knew how to let you really see what the rest of us see as you lead your teachers and students at LaGrange Highlands. You are a principal with what seems to me like an infinite supply of wisdom and knowledge, not to mention patience. You aim tirelessly to be the most professional and caring leader you possibly can, and it shows in all you do. Working with hundreds of students, it’s evident that you truly view each student as an integral part of society and work to create an environment where everyone at the school experiences success and a meaningful education. Really, babe, how do you do this?

While loving your family well and leading a school with wisdom and care, you have spent countless weekends for the last four years furthering your own education. Not once in all of this time have I heard you talk about it like it is some amazing accomplishment or that anyone should applaud you for it. But babe, just for the record, we all do! You have modeled to the kids a healthy balance of love, life and learning, and you’ve made it look way too easy.

I know it hasn’t been. I know all about your sleepless nights, the weekends you’ve balanced school and being a dad as if you were in a dedicated brain surgeon intricately working to keep every patient alive, and the worries that come with wondering if you have spread yourself too thin. And if I can take a moment to flip the roles, let me tell you: Where you are at with your doctorate is kind of like it being Thursday. You’ve almost made it to the weekend!

I know there are some love stories that have sparkles and firecrackers and all sorts of fancy ingredients. Those are awesome, and they make for really sweet memories. But I think there is something special and strong about our story, too, babe. We are in it for the long game. Nothing about our marriage is a sprint, and of course every marathon has its grueling miles. But goodness knows that when we hit those moments, nothing brings me greater comfort than seeing you right alongside me, running hard and smiling at me because you know that we have what it takes. And every day for as long as I live, I will know that you are truly the best thing that has ever happened to me. Please don’t ever forget that.

I love you forever, BG.

Xoxo,
Me

--Lisa Graber

See all Patch love letters here.

For next month's Love In A Small Town feature, we want to know: What place in town will always be a reminder of love for you? Whether it's the park where you had your first kiss or the restaurant where he proposed, email your story to locallove@patch.com for the chance to be featured. Get more details here.