It's Okay Honey, I Forgive You

Okay, it's not like I'm from the concrete jungle and have never appreciated nature before. I grew up in Union County, I've been fishing and camping since I was 5-years-old. But the amount of nature I took in at one time yesterday..well, it was a lot for me.

There are beehives on Route 520 in Marlboro, just near Route 34. They are lined up nicely on the side of the road, and looked very enticing to the small swarm of bees attempting to fly across the street to them.

But some of those bees decided to take a ride in my car instead. On my shirt, specifically. Cue the screaming.

Yes, bugs creep me out and I scream. Just ask my poor boyfriend what happens when I find a spider in the apartment.

There's no shoulder on that stretch of road, and it isn't the safest thing to haphazardly pull over on a 50 mph road. So I drove. And screamed. And the bees seemed to be quite happy exploring my car, and my jacket.

As I looked down to "gently" shake them off, a turkey decided to stop in the middle of the road ahead of me and stare. He probably heard the awful noise coming out of my mouth.

So I swerved, narrowly missing the fence containing the emus. The cow up the road was probably laughing at me.

As I pulled into the Dunkin Donuts parking lot, flinging my door open and shaking my hair out, I realized how unique Monmouth County is. I went from swerving around a turkey and fighting off a swarm (I'm sticking to that word, in my mind there were thousands of them...), to parking in a strip mall and contemplating a craving for coffee. 

I've been working in Monmouth County for two years. When I was younger, I assumed everything south of Union County was beach. Imagine my surprise when I came into Marlboro and Colts Neck, surrounded by llamas, sheep, pigs, cows and even emus. Some of them even roam the streets, making my job interesting.

But, like many of you, I wouldn't have it any other way. And from now on, I'll be driving past those hives with my windows closed, on my way to purchase another jar of local honey.


To my knowledge, no bees were harmed during this horrific adventure. We all escaped with our lives.