A Life Beyond Our Own: Why People Are Scared By Death

“The idea of death, the fear of it, haunts the human animal like nothing else,” wrote Earnest Becker. In fact, it’s a fear strong enough to compel all of us to force leafy greens down our throats, run on a treadmill on a Monday morning, and let strangers with white coats stab needles into our arms when the weather gets cold. And what isn’t there to be afraid of? It’s the ultimate end! But while some people cringe at the word’s mere mention, others accept more calmly. So why do some people fear death more than others? Why do we even fear death at all?

It turns out that varying levels of this fear are influenced by very simple factors. One of them is age. While we tend to assume that older people who are closer to death are more afraid of it, studies have proven that the opposite is true. A hypothesis is that the elderly have lived more of life, and are less worried about missing out. It could also be because they have more experience dealing with this topic before and have understood the inevitability of passing away.

Speaking of experience, interactions with danger may also change your fear of death. Though some experiences make you fear death less, too much might increase your fear. Here’s an example. In a unique study, researchers recruited novice, amateur, and professional skydivers to share their feelings about death. Novice skydivers, with only an average of 1 jump under their belt, were extremely scared of death. Amateur skydivers, with an average of 90 jumps, were a lot less scared. But—and this is the interesting part—expert skydivers, who had jumped over 700 times, were more scared of death than amateur skydivers. This debunks the myth that more experience in dangerous situations numbs a person’s attitude towards dying. There may be a learning curve, where getting some experience makes you feel less anxious (maybe because you gain a greater sense of control), but getting a lot of experience makes you more aware that you can’t cheat death after all.

On a more direct approach, interactions with death may also change the fear of death. We try to avoid talking about this death because it often makes us uncomfortable, but avoidance can make those things loom even larger in our minds. An interesting study with funeral directors found that those who had directed more funerals feared deathless. Among physicians, more years of experience, and more exposure to death, also led to less fear of death.

One last note. Make your life meaningful. Filling our moments awake with actions that we are proud of makes our day-to-day routines more fulfilling and accomplished. Remember to keep your mind open and never compromise your values. Death may be a scary topic to think about, but it is a lot easier for one to die proudly if we have lived proudly.