Doughboys, Dels and Weiners, oh my!

I was attending the most recent Water Fire in Providence with my husband and some friends when we stumbled upon a doughboy vendor. My husband had a hankering, and I haven't had a doughboy in years so we decided to treat ourselves to one. Three of us got in line, ordered our slab of fried dough and headed to the sugar table. What happened next was appalling.

There was no granulated sugar. None for miles. Oh there was powdered sugar, cinnamon, and granulated sugar MIXED WITH CINNAMON, but no plain granulated sugar. My friend even asked, in desperation, "Excuse me, don't you have granulated sugar?" I nodded, providing a united front. The answer was a unequivocal no. My world went blurry, I started to see double and began to feel faint. Then, my friend pulled the rug out from under me. He sprinkled granulated sugar and cinnamon atop his doughboy. Et tu Brute? He explained that since there was no granulated sugar, what else was he going to do? My husband looked at the both of us and said, "I don't put anything on mine." and walked away. He's from Syracuse, NY so he doesn't know what he's doing. A young fella who overheard our conversation tried to comfort me by comparing cinnamon on a doughboy to a cinnamon donut. I smiled a weak smile in appreciation of his efforts, but he was obviously misguided. I reluctantly picked up the powdered sugar and began sprinkling away, cringing at every shake of the jar.

As a Rhode Islander, I'm very particular as to how one should consume our indigenous food and drink. And sometimes I even question my parenting skills on this very basis. On one of the oppressively hot days last week, I took my kids to Del's lemonade on Route 5 in Cranston. I figured a nice icy cold lemony refreshment was what we all needed after a long sweltering day at school. We got up to the window and my son had the audacity to order a medium watermelon and my daughter added salt to the wound by ordering a small cherry. Never have I been so ashamed. There is only one flavor in my mind - lemon. Even the slogan is "Stop at the sign of the lemon," not "Stop at the sign of the blue raspberry." I grabbed my son's hand before he could collect a straw from the container and said to him, "Don't even THINK about it."

As we were headed back to our cars after Water Fire, we passed the Haven Brother's truck parked in it's usual spot in downcity Providence. One couple we were with hailed from Connecticut, so they were quite curious with the differences in our homegrown cased meats. They didn't realize that a hot dog was quite different than a hot weiner. Then you throw a Saugy into the mix and their minds were BLOWN. "But what's the difference?" she asked me. "What's the difference?" I thought to myself. What IS the difference? It's something I never really thought about. I've just enjoyed appreciating each one for it's own unique, succulent flavor and texture. What I do know is a weiner should be eaten "all the way" with celery salt, mustard, onions and meat sauce. A saugy should be served on a grilled bun with mustard and onions. As far as the ingredients of what makes up each particular sausage, let's face it, some things are better left unsaid.

Look, I'm not here to food-shame anyone. But the next time you're in line at Iggy's ordering a cup of Manhattan clam chowder, please know that I'M WATCHING YOU.