The Curse Of The Pumpkin

[By Bob Houghtaling]

Some may scoff.

Others ignore.

But, the "Pumpkin’s Curse"

is something I saw.

So, sit back friends,

it’s a scary tale

about what happens

when school kids fail.

This story, macabre,

has goblins and ghouls,

all of whom

prey on our schools.

The Curse of the Pumpkin

There once was a time.

There once was a place,

where teaching kids

became a race.

Where kids were tested

day and night

to see if they

could answer just right.

They raced in the cities.

They raced in the towns.

Each student was rated

either up or down.

In order to determine

who was the best,

folks at the top

had invented a test.

Called it the NECAP

and gave it much weight.

If you didn’t pass it,

you’d graduate late.

Or perhaps worse,

not at all.

This test was given

each and every fall.

Those folks at the top

of a place called RIDE

looked at the testing

with all kinds of pride.

They talked about measures,

standards and failings.

They talked of how

those teachers were derailing

their efforts to test

each laddie and lass.

“How dare they,” one stated,

“have each student pass.”

Now, some of the children

from very rich schools

had little problem

playing RIDE’s rules.

Many tested quite high.

Few tested quite low.

Most were quite sure

of which college they’d go.

It didn’t quite matter

what they had learned.

All anyone cared

was the grade each kid earned.

But, for a number of children

it was hard to write.

They spoke different languages

or their wallets were tight.

And, when considering math,

those with special needs

were hurt worst of all.

Were hurt most indeed.

At a moment when things

where going so slow,

voices from Providence

told which way to go.

Students of color,

Hispanic and white,

all came together

to do something right.

They sang in the evening.

They spoke in the day.

Telling all listeners

testing wasn’t the way.

Then lo and behold,

other strong voices

followed the students

extolling new choices.

Rumblings and bumblings

came from the top.

The boss of all bosses

said, “This has to stop.”

So she sent out henchmen,

set down new rules,

fired some teachers,

closed some old schools.

Then, with all of this done

and much more said,

she brought out new pencils

loaded with lead.

More tests were ordered

rather than less.

Why this was done

‘twas anyone’s guess.

When all seemed lost,

at a point of despair,

an autumn wind

provided something rare.

You see, dear reader,

during each autumn season,

many things happen

despite any reason.

The Mets won a series.

The NECAPs are done.

Bizarre things happen

with the shortening sun.

Yes, a Halloween gift

from a power unseen

turned everyone at RIDE

back into a teen.

And, not only that,

this is what’s best,

they were all forced to take

a standardized test.

When, surprise of surprises,

few of them passed,

each was ordered to

a remedial class.

For so many students

this nightmare is here.

Today’s graduation requirements

are something to fear.

EPILOGUE

Ask no questions,

get no tales,

Gates and his buddies

all did fail.

And let’s not forget

our friend Arne Duncan.

He too fell prey

to the "Curse of the Pumpkin."

The End (or is it?)