Migraines & Marriage: Providence Woman Tells Her Story On Web MD

PROVIDENCE, RI — A migraine isn't just a headache, according to Melanie Grossi, a Providence woman who's suffered from the disease since age 12. Grossi and her husband Chris are appearing in a five-part WebMD video,“In Their Own Words: Moving Beyond Migraine.” Good Morning America’s Robin Roberts, who is the series host, introduced the venture last week on GMA. The Grossi's appear in Episode 3: When Pain Comes Between Us: Migraines And Marriage.

Allowing the cameras into their home and talking about their marriage was a big intrusion, she acknowledged in a telephone interview with Patch, but they both feel it's worth the trouble to spread the word about migraines. If there's any message they would like the television audience to take away from the show, she said, it's that migraine is a complex disease of the brain and not much research is being done to find a cure.

"My hope is to educate people about migraine," she said. When most hear the word, they "think headache," she added. "Headache is a symptom. Migraine is really a complex disease." It's actually the sixth most debilitating disease in the world, and yet the research funding is "miniscule," she said.

Grossi said her migraines started at age 12 and were associated with the onset of puberty. Her migraine episodes started as ordinary migraines, which were bad enough, but manageable until she was 37 or so. Then, she suffered an episode of intercranial hypertension, which refers to high pressure around the brain and spinal cord. That resolved, but "from that point on, my migraines became chronic," she said. The usual cure of jumping on a migraine fast with over the counter painkillers doesn't help.

"I'm well beyond that point," she said. She's tried all kinds of experimental cures from Botox to Alzheimer's medications. So far, nothing has worked, but she will keep trying. Meanwhile, despite the difficulties, her husband has been her caregiver. They've managed to not let the disease overwhelm their marriage, she said.

Chris and Melanie Grossi at Green Gables on Prince Edward Island. They've managed to do a lot in the past 12 years, despite her migraine disease.

"My husband is amazing," she said. "He has rolled with every punch." In their video segment, they go into the strains this disease has put on their marriage but also show how adversity "made us stronger," she said.

On the minus side, she's had to give up her job at Brown University. She had been employed there 15 years and felt she was doing important work. But three years after her chronic migraines started, she was absent more than she was present, and she didn't think she should continue. Then, they had to stop traveling, which was one of their joys. With only one adult child, who has her own family now, they had been free to take trips. And although they still manage some short getaways, her migraines ended their worldwide adventures.

Her husband has been there for her, nonetheless. His family background is part of the reason, she believes. His mother has suffered from migraines, and so does one of his brothers. So he'd had some experience with the disease. Also, his parents have been happily married some 48 years, she said, and he learned how to be a good husband from them. He's not the type who's in a marriage with one foot out the door. His parents have been there for them, too. It helps his mother's a nurse.

Chris did know she had migraines before they married, she said. But they weren't the chronic migraines that struck when she was in her late 30's.

Both Grossi's have roots in Rhode Island. Although she was born in Providence, she traveled during her elementary school years. As the child of a military family, she attended schools in Germany, California and Texas. But her grandparents' home in Johnston was the place they landed between assignments. Then, she ended up in Johnston and managed to spend all four years at Johnston High. When she had her first child, she also lived in Cranston and Edgewood.

She met Chris when her daughter was 15. She had been on her own for a while, and they both worked at Brown.

"I had a crush on him," she said, but she was reluctant to pursue her feelings because of their jobs. But ultimately, she e-mailed him. He felt the same, it turned out.

"He was put in my path for a reason," she said. He's been her hero.

Courtesy Photo Caption: Grossi with her migraine buddy, Lucy, the cat. "The reddish lenses in my glasses are special made for migraineurs with light sensitivity," she said.